since i’ve been a spaz for a good 29 years now, and i find myself terribly endearing, i thought i’d bring it to the masses. i am only thoughtful insofar as i am pursuing my phd. things not taught in the phd that spazes like me need to know: how to free yourself from public bathroom stalls because you continuously lock yourself in; how to do basic math; how to read time when there are hands instead of digital illuminated numbers; basic grammar, punctuation, and capitalization; generally how to have a good time; and finally, how not to blurt out the following upon meeting someone: “oh my god, you have GIGANTIC hands!”, “I thought Winnipeg was just a myth and that no one would ever actually live there,” and other such gems.

so here is my attempt to metamorphasize spastically into thoughtfulness. or vice versa. whatevs.

~ jacks, the thoughtful spaz